Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Call Me Grace - Part 2

What to do when you accidentally break your toe while driving:

1. Scream

2. Bang your head on the steering wheel

3. Yell really loud as your mom looks at you with concern

4. Tell your mom that you need an ambulance

5. Laugh uncontrollably

6. Laugh uncontrollably while you wish you could cut off your left foot

7. Laugh uncontrollably because you realize only a special kind of coordination could cause a person to break their own toe, in their own car, while driving

8. Blame Kansas

9. Blame your Old Navy flip flops

10. Blame Honda

11. Scream again

12. Ask your mom to give you a hug

13. Ask your mom to take the wheel while you crawl in the back to suck on your toe

14. Wonder why you ever bought a car in the first place

15. Wonder why you have toes

16. Wonder why you exist

17. Wonder how the ground ever became so flat

18. Wish you could go back and redo the last ten seconds

19. Wish you had your own loaf of chocolate chip zucchini bread to comfort you

20. Cry again

21. Laugh again

22. Take a five second nap

23. Look for snakes on the road to run over

24. Realize you cannot begin your 5K running plan

25. Smile triumphantly because you realize you cannot begin your 5K running plan

26. Accidentally bump your pulsating toe

27. Scream and pass out

In conclusion, my fourth toe on my left foot now looks like a purple grape.

It's not pretty, folks.


  1. Save yourself the trouble and just blame Kansas. ;)

  2. Wow. That sounds...intense.

  3. Only you could do this.

  4. Sarah! I'm shocked. I'm sorry. Your feet demand a lot of attention of the medical kind, don't they? And tell Scott I'm pretty sure I could manage this.