Sunday, February 6, 2011

Organic or Bust

For 2011, I am attempting to try one new thing every month. Dance classes, photography classes, new countries and shorts are on my agenda. So for the month of January I began eating organic. Organic fruit, veggies, meat, nuts, everything. I even buy organic hummus. Weird, I know.

And I know this may sound trendy and froo froo and perhaps borderline ridiculous, but I have to admit there is power in the organic. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against non-organic food. I have eaten them my entire life. But I just felt it was time to make a change and I am happy to report that I feel fantastic! I have more energy, my shoulders seem less sore and I have never eaten so much spinach in all my life.

In other words, I have turned into a rabbit.

A rabbit who eats bacon and almond butter.

Anywho. In my effort to eat better I have discovered the amazing and diverse world of Whole Foods. Of course I have ducked in and out of these stores before but I had never shopped there, you know, REALLY shopped there. I have always felt like I had to have a North Face jacket on to even step foot through the door or at least know how to properly pronounce the word quinoa.

But Whole Foods has a monopoly on all things organic, so I put aside my extreme lack of Colorado trendiness and decided to give it a go, fake Ugg boots and all. Here are my initial thoughts:
  • The bakery may be the most beautiful place on earth. If I could live there, I would. I'm serious.
  • I have a new-found love for sea salt.
  • I don't understand how you can have an entire row just for olives.
  • Greek yogurt is the newest craze and I admit that I love being on that bandwagon.
  • The produce section is a feast for the eyes. It is exquisite and delicious and colorful and exotic. And I currently have more navel oranges than I know what to do with.
  • I hate to say this, but the majority of people who shop there are less than friendly. I don't know what their deal is but apparently my Oklahoma charm falls short. I try to smile at them and they look at me like I just cut down the last tree in the rain forest. I didn't, people. I didn't.
  • The people who work there, on the other hand, are fabulous. They smile often and don't yell at me if I forget my reusable bags.
  • I am not sure how I feel about organic shampoo. I love my Pantene. Chemicals seem to make my hair extra shiny.
  • The meat department is very intimidating. I don't really know how to order food from a butcher. I'm thinking I can't just say "I like meat" and they'll understand what I want. Is there a users guide for this?
  • I have never seen so many different kinds of organic granolas in all my life. Apparently snobby people love their fiber. Who knew?
  • Items that contain artificial sweeteners, colors, dyes or textures are nowhere to be found. If you are looking for your favorite sour blueberry koolaid "juice" pop then you will have to go elsewhere.
  • I am in awe of their dried fruit and nut selection.
  • Organic dark chocolate bars with almonds and sea salt have changed my life. I am better person because of it.
  • The number of handsome men who shop at these stores is above average. And as long as we don't have to talk about hiking, color me available.
So there you have it. I'll keep you posted on my Whole Food encounters. That place is a treasure trove of pretentious humanity and culinary utopia just waiting to happen!


    1. Just stay away from the organic me, it doesn more harm than good : )

    2. I freaking do not even know where to begin. This is so very witty and creative. I mean, you could really have your own talk show.

    3. I agree! Very well written. I love the last line! I think you're channeling Dr. Grounds and his plethora of outstanding vocabulary words.
      I hope you meet a non-hiking, cowboy hottie in the granola section. What a love story you could have!

    4. I am terrified of Whole Foods but I may have to stop in now that you have braved it first. Miss you friend!

    5. Is the foray into WF because you no longer have a car payment, or is the high price of whole grains just a myth?

    6. Tirzah - that is awesome advice. Thanks for the heads up...that could be a stinky situation. :)

      Anonymous - you make me laugh so much!! And thanks, my own talk show would probably be fun but potentially a train wreck.

      Mel - Holy moly, mentioning me and Dr. Grounds in the same sentence?! Hardly. But thanks,s weet friend. And yes, cowboys at Whole Foods is my goal.

      Rach - let's go together!! Seriously! I was intimidated too. :)

      Sheryl - Organic is a bit more expensive but I have cut out processed and refined foods so I am saving on that end. In the long run I see it as an investment in my health. :) Miss you!!

    7. What about the free samples?? You didn't mention those. Those are one of my favorite parts. Michael is still traumatized from the $50 I spent on Atlantic salmon at the seafood counter last fall. (If I were single I would tell you to take note of the rough-looking seafood men serving up organic orange roughy in their chest high orange waders. Of course, as a married woman, I don't notice these things any longer.)

      I <3 WF. Big prices and all. It's a beautiful thing to behold. And, for the record, I'll smile back and be nice to you if I see you shopping there.

    8. Oh my gosh. I secretly have a crush on all of the men who work the seafood counter at WF. They are all hilarious - no matter what store you're in. I like how they try really hard to sell you fish when all you really need is some milk. Some day I'm gonna go there and buy their fish. Yes. Yes I am. Maybe I'll even have a real conversation with one of them.