The GDE: Communication Gems

Since my date with Tex, I have been trying even harder at the online dating gig. I still do not enjoy it but I want to give it my all because if this doesn't work I don't want it to have been because of my lack of effort.
And if it does work, well then pigs will actually be flying.

Recently, I have had some seriously scary/funny conversations with a few of the guys on this site. I have decided to share a few of their questions or comments with you but also the responses I had in my head as I read them. Brace yourself, dear readers. These people are really real.

"Are you modest?" 

Fiscally? Fashionably? Romantically? I am confused. And a little weirded out by that question.

"Your eyes are like the Atlantic Ocean and I wish I could swim in them."

Please don't. My optometrist would not like that.

"Do you own any firearms?"

Uhh, do you?

"I have to let you know that I dance like the guy on Hitch."

We should totally get married. (And yes, I totally wrote him back.)

"Your profile gave me a smile so I am giving you one in fair exchange."

I don't know what that means. And I am currently not smiling.

"Hi, I appreciate the importance of Christianity in your life. If you would consider someone of my age, kindly write back."

I appreciate your thoughtfulness and effort, but I am not ready to date a 43 year old. I am pretty sure I just graduated high school.


Scary stuff, peeps. Scary stuff. Dating is literally survival of the fittest.

And...Happy Halloween to you!