Yesterday in Detail

Y'all. I am in the middle of those all-day meetings that happen twice a year at my office. We discuss everything from visas in Egypt to crashing servers and somehow manage to still like each other at the end of the day. It is a minor miracle, my friends. A minor miracle. And because I know you are dying to see what goes on in one of these meetings, I have typed it out for you in excruciating detail.

You're welcome.

6:30:  My alarm goes off and I resist the urge to throw it against the wall.

7:24:  Leave my apartment and try not to freeze to death in the frigid temperatures. Also, my soup leaks in my lunch bag. Major bummer.

7:44:  Arrive at work and take off several layers of clothes. Breathe. Sip some coffee and decide that I shouldn't even check email before the meetings begin because that would just make me cry.

8:00:  The meetings begin with devotions. We discuss 1 Thessalonians. Who knew that was such a great book?

9:15:  Coffee refill.

9:30:  I kick off the presentations of what went well and what didn't go well in my department for 2011. This quickly leads into a discussion of raising funds in a bad economy, in which I curl up in the fetal position and pray for fruitful year-end giving. Immediately following, my colleagues give their updates until lunch time.

12:00:  Eat my soup...at least the part that didn't spill into my lunch bag.

1:00:  Continue hearing updates from the regional directors who oversee a total of 13 countries. Some very important information was discussed here. I am almost certain we will have world peace by the end of this week.

2:30: Break. Eat a piece of chocolate cake made by my boss's wife. It was unbelievably delectable and I would like to request one every Tuesday.

2:45: The meeting resumes and this time we talk about our budget. There's nothing like a bunch of charts and numbers to make this liberal arts major want to take a nap. However, it was a very productive discussion.

5:30:  End meeting for the day and pile into a car to drive to dinner.

5:37:  Stuck in rush hour traffic on the highway.

5:42:  Stuck in rush hour traffic on the highway.

6:01:  Pull up to Maggiano's for dinner and gladly accept the free valet parking.

6:02:  Inhale all the wonderful smells of carbohydrates.

8:02:  Waddle out of Maggiano's.

8:43:  Drop by Claire and Carr's apartment to deliver a wedding gift from a friend and to sit on their new couch. It is a great couch. You should go sit on it too.

9:18:  Leave their apartment and try not to biff it in the parking lot.  Mission accomplished.

9:25:  Stop by my parent's house to pick up the list of campers my dad had given me on Sunday in which I left in my mom's car Sunday night. She and I have a cup of tea and we discuss the aforementioned meetings in which I realize that I am so tired I have become light headed. I sit there until it subsides and I realize that my alarm will go off in less than 8 hours.

10:27:  Leave the house and drive to my apartment.

10:37:  Arrive at my apartment and load the dishwasher, make coffee for the morning, pack my lunch, take a shower, check my email, do a crossword puzzle, turn on my heating pad and go to bed.

11:26. Fall asleep and pray that we have a snow day tomorrow.


And there you have it. Please take a nap for me.